Illustrated image for article Super-helper syndrome: are we helping ourselves or just others?!

Super-helper syndrome: are we helping ourselves or just others?

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The story of a person who was chronically untreatable from this syndrome until now. A person who has always looked out for the good of other people and thus put the welfare of others before his own. 


But what kind of disease is this? Yes, it can be described as such, because it is very difficult to get rid of this need.

Super-helper syndrome refers to a condition in which a person consistently tries to help others, often at the expense of his or her well-being. Recovery from this syndrome itself requires a combination of self-awareness, self-care, and boundary-setting. 


So if someone has cost you effort, time, money, energy, or feelings, then this condition points directly at you and needs to stop as part of your health. 

(I speak from personal experience, unfortunately)...


Let's clarify the 4 most important things you need to do to recover from said syndrome...


1. Self-awareness and reflection: recognize the problem and understand your motivations!

The first step to recovery from any syndrome or condition is to recognize that you simply have it.

Reflect on your behavior and identify patterns of overexerting yourself to help others every time.

Explore why you feel the need to be a "super-helper". Is it a desire for validation, fear of rejection, or a sense of responsibility?

Understanding your motivation can help you address the root causes.


2. Setting boundaries: learn to say NO and prioritize taking care of yourself!

 One of the key elements in overcoming "super-helper" syndrome is learning to say NO when necessary. You can't constantly help everyone without sacrificing your well-being.  Practice setting boundaries and refusing requests that are beyond your capacity.

Could you make taking care of yourself part of your non-negotiable routine? This includes getting enough sleep, eating well, regular exercise, and activities that bring you joy and relaxation. If you take care of yourself, you will be better prepared to help others sustainably.


3. Seek support or advice: therapy or group support! 

 Consider seeking professional help, such as therapy or specialized counseling, to address any underlying issues related to the syndrome. A therapist can help you explore your feelings, motivations, and behaviors and provide strategies for change. 

Another option is to join a support group or community where you can connect with others who have experienced similar problems. Sharing your experiences and learning from others can be incredibly valuable.


4. Develop healthy relationships: communicate and surround yourself with the right people! 

 Improve your communication skills to clearly express your needs and boundaries to friends, family, or colleagues. Quality relationships are based on open and honest communication. 

Build connections with individuals who respect your boundaries and support your efforts to care for your health. Limit your exposure to people who constantly take advantage of your helpful nature.

Recovering from this syndrome is a process that takes time and effort. It involves a shift in thinking and behavior toward a healthier balance between helping others and caring for yourself.


Remember that taking care of yourself is not selfish, it's just necessary for your overall well-being and your ability to truly help both parties in a balanced way.

Have you found yourself in a similar situation? Are you experiencing something similar and can't name it?

Let me know, I'm here for you...

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